Episode 328: ‘The Magnificent Seven,’ ‘Other People,’ ‘The Good Neighbor,’ ‘Mr. Church,’ ‘Operation Avalanche,’ ‘Max Rose,’ Fantastic Fest preview

0:00 – Hello, drinking, an iTunes review, a cute story about Dylan
4:10 – “The Magnificent Seven” review
14:30 – “Other People” review
26:30 – “The Good Neighbor” review

32:30 – “Mr. Church” review
39:35 – “Operation Avalanche” review
45:40 – “Max Rose” review (Bayer only)
48:40 – What we’re looking forward to seeing at Fantastic Fest
56:50 – What’s new on DVD this week
1:01:50 – Recap and good day

REVIEWS:
The Magnificent Seven: B+ 8/10 (B.S.-approved!)
Other People: B- 7/10
The Good Neighbor: B- 7/10
Mr. Church: C 5/10
Operation Avalanche: C+ 5/10
Max Rose: n/a 5/10

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Episode 327: ‘Blair Witch,’ ‘Bridget Jones’s Baby,’ ‘The Hollars,’ ‘Snowden’

0:00 – Hello, cat barf, iTunes review
3:00 – Housekeeping items: renewed call for new theme songs; our Patreon campaign
6:10 – “Blair Witch” review
15:00 – “Bridget Jones’s Baby” review (Snider only)

25:25 – “The Hollars” review (Snider only)
30:35 – “Snowden” review (Snider only)
37:20 – QOTW (movies from 2001 that deserve sequels)
45:00 – We’re putting QOTW on hiatus, doing some other retooling
46:25 – Bayer’s report on being a Mormon for a week
55:05 – Recap, good day, and a delightful outtake

REVIEWS:
Blair Witch: B- 5/10
The Hollars: D+ n/a
Bridget Jones’s Baby: B- n/a
Snowden: C n/a

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Episode 326: ‘Sully,’ Character Casserole

0:00 – Hello, Jeff’s on vacation, maybe you can drink out of a pelican?
3:15 – “Sully” review
15:45 – Some other movies that are opening that they didn’t show anyone

18:40 – QOTW (great scenes that are BOATS [based on a true story]), discussion of microwave vs. blender in terms of preferred method of death
26:20 – A round of Character Casserole
34:30 – Recap, maybe go watch a Gene Wilder movie, and good day

QOTW: In honor of “Bridget Jones’s Baby,” what other movie from 2001 deserves a sequel? (Here’s a list: 2001 films.)

REVIEWS:
Sully: C+ 7/10

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Final Results of the 2016 Summer Box Office Challenge

2016 Winner: Snider
Overall Record
Snider 3 — Bayer 3

Eric D. Snider

1) Captain America: Civil War (5/4)
$179,139,142
4) Ghostbusters (7/15)
$46,018,755
6) Finding Dory (6/17)
$135,060,273
8) The Angry Birds Movie (5/20)
$38,155,177
10) Star Trek Beyond (7/22)
$59,253,211
12) The BFG (7/1)
$18,775,350
14) The Secret Life of Pets (7/8)
$104,352,905
16) Neighbors 2: Sorority Rising
$21,760,405
18) Warcraft (6/10)
$24,166,110
20) Me Before You (6/3)
$18,723,269
TOTAL:
$645,404,597

 

Jeff Bayer

2) Independence Day: Resurgence (6/24)
$41,039,944
3) Suicide Squad (8/5)
$133,682,248
5) X-Men: Apocalypse (5/27)
$65,769,562
7) Jason Bourne (7/29)
$59,215,365
9) TMNT: Out of the Shadows (6/3)
$35,316,382
11) The Conjuring 2 (6/10)
$40,406,314
13) Ice Age: Collision Course (7/22)
$21,373,064
15) Central Intelligence (6/17)
$35,535,250
17) Alice Through the Looking Glass (5/27)
$26,858,726
19) Pete’s Dragon (8/12)
$21,514,095
TOTAL:
$480,710,950

 

DIFFERENCE: $164,693,647

THE STAKES:

1) The winner will personally give the loser a haircut at Fantastic Fest, to be worn throughout the fest.
2) The loser will spend a week living the winner’s lifestyle. To wit:
– If Snider loses, he will spend a week as a full-time stay-at-home dad (early mornings, middle-of-the-night awakenings, other inconveniences TBA).
– Is Bayer loses, he will spend a week as a Mormon (no coffee, tea, alcohol, or tobacco; no profanity; must go to church on Sunday).

ACTUAL TOP 20 OPENING WEEKENDS:
*movies that neither of us chose

1) Captain America: Civil War (5/4)
$179,139,142
6) Finding Dory (6/17)
$135,060,273
3) Suicide Squad (8/5)
$133,682,248
14) The Secret Life of Pets (7/8)
$104,352,905
5) X-Men: Apocalypse (5/27)
$65,769,562
10) Star Trek Beyond (7/22)
$59,253,211
7) Jason Bourne (7/29)
$59,215,365
4) Ghostbusters (7/15)
$46,018,755
2) Independence Day: Resurgence (6/24)
$41,039,944
11) The Conjuring 2 (6/10)
$40,406,314
*) The Legend of Tarzan (7/1)
$38,527,856
8) The Angry Birds Movie (5/20)
$38,155,177
15) Central Intelligence (6/17)
$35,535,250
9) TMNT: Out of the Shadows (6/3)
$35,316,382
*) Sausage Party (8/12)
$34,263,534
*) The Purge: Election Year (7/1)
$31,515,110
17) Alice Through the Looking Glass (5/27)
$26,858,726
*) Don’t Breathe (8/26)
$26,411,706
18) Warcraft (6/10)
$24,166,110
*) Now You See Me 2 (6/10)
$22,383,146

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Episode 325: ‘Morgan,’ ‘The Light Between Oceans,’ ‘Complete Unknown’

0:00 – Greetings, an iTunes review, Jeff’s ears
4:15 – “Morgan” review
11:50 – “The Light Between Oceans” review

20:20 – “Complete Unknown” review
29:00 – Everyone’s favorite and least favorite movies of the summer
37:00 – Next week’s QOTW, and boats and BOATS, and a fave/least fave we forgot
41:10 – Recap and good day

QOTW: What are some great scenes that are BOATS (based on a true story)? (Bonus points if the BOATS scenes take place on boats.)

REVIEWS:
Morgan: C+ 6/10
The Light Between Oceans: B 8/10
Complete Unknown: B 7/10

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Episode 324: ‘Don’t Breathe,’ ‘Southside with You,’ Pitch Me

0:00 – Hello, here is an iTunes review
2:10 – “Mechanic: Resurrection” and “Hands of Stone” may or may not be real movies
5:00 – “Don’t Breathe” review (Snider only)

12:00 – “Southside with You” review, beginning with a digression on BOATS and Twitter (shoutouts to @filmdrunk and @mattsinger)
19:00 – QOTW (birthday stories that would make good movies; shoutout to @jcdeleon1)
34:10 – A round of Pitch Me (shoutout to @rejects)
41:40 – Recap, good day

QOTW: Tell us your 1 favorite and 1 least favorite movie of summer 2016.

REVIEWS:
Don’t Breathe: B+
Southside with You: B- 5/10

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Episode 323: ‘War Dogs,’ ‘Kubo and the Two Strings,’ ‘Ben-Hur,’ Summer Box Office Challenge final results

0:00 – Welcome to the show; an iTunes review en español
2:30 – “War Dogs” review
14:00 – “Kubo and the Two Strings” review
20:20 – “Ben-Hur” review
30:20 – An interesting “Ben-Hur” fact

31:50 – QOTW (pre-1960 movies that should be remade, and how they would be different)
43:25 – The official conclusion of the 2016 Summer Box Office Challenge; a recitation of what Bayer’s punishments will be; there is much negotiation concerning the haircut
50:50 – Recap and good day

QOTW: In honor of Eric’s birthday (Aug. 26; gifts and tributes welcome), tell us a true story about one of your birthdays and we’ll make it into a movie.

REVIEWS:
War Dogs: C 5/10
Kubo and the Two Strings: B 8/10
Ben-Hur: C 4/10

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Episode 322: ‘Hell or High Water,’ ‘Florence Foster Jenkins,’ ‘Don’t Think Twice,’ ‘Sausage Party,’ ‘Nine Lives’

0:00 – Hello, brought to you by honest lemonade
1:55 – “Hell or High Water” review
12:15 – “Florence Foster Jenkins” review
21:50 – “Don’t Think Twice” review



31:25 – “Sausage Party” review (Snider only)
38:40 – “Nine Lives” sort of review (Snider only)
43:40 – QOTW (bad movies that could be remade well)
54:00 – Recap, additional commentary, good day

QOTW: What pre-1960 movie should be remade, and how would it be different today?

REVIEWS:
Hell or High Water: B+ 8/10
Florence Foster Jenkins: B+ 7/10
Don’t Think Twice: B+ 8/10
Sausage Party: B n/a
Nine Lives: C- n/a

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Episode 321: ‘Suicide Squad,’ Character Casserole

0:00 – Hello, “folks”
1:00 – One of this week’s movies was hidden from critics, if you can imagine
4:45 – “Suicide Squad” review
24:55 – QOTW (superhero stories that have yet to be told), including discussion of Jeff’s TV snobbery



33:30 – Some more “Suicide Squad” complaining, reiteration of call for new theme songs
39:00 – A round of Character Casserole
46:50 – Recap and goodbye

QOTW: What’s a bad movie that could be good if it were remade properly?

REVIEWS:
Suicide Squad: D 4/10

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Episode 320: ‘Jason Bourne,’ ‘Bad Moms,’ ‘Nerve,’ ‘Star Trek Beyond’

0:00 – A quick hello and an iTunes review
3:00 – “Jason Bourne” review
14:35 – “Bad Moms” review
24:25 – “Nerve” review



33:15 – “Star Trek Beyond” review
37:45 – QOTW (other “bad” versions of good occupations)
48:00 – A report on birthdays, specifically the one Jeff just had
52:35 – A brief Summer Box Office Challenge update, recap, goodbye

QOTW: What superhero story has yet to be told?

REVIEWS:
Jason Bourne: C 9/10
Bad Moms: B- 6/10
Nerve: C+ 5/10
Star Trek Beyond: B- 8/10

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Episode 319: ‘Lights Out,’ ‘Ice Age: Collision Course,’ ‘Absolutely Fabulous: The Movie,’ our 1,000th review

0:00 – Hello; a call for new, shorter theme songs
5:05 – They only screened “Star Trek Beyond” in New York and L.A., and we don’t live either of those places
6:40 – “Ice Age: Collision Course” review (Snider only)
12:20 – “Lights Out” review
19:35 – We celebrate our 1,000th review with a new searchable database! (Mark from Winnipeg helped a lot, so please check out TheLifeYouCanSave.org on his behalf)
24:10 – “Absolutely Fabulous: The Movie” review (Snider only)
28:10 – Maybe we’ll talk about “Star Trek Beyond” next week
29:00 – QOTW (Mt. Rushmore of sci-fi movies)
42:40 – Brief, tactful Summer Box Office Challenge update, recap, goodbye

QOTW: In the tradition of “Bad Moms,” “Bad Santa,” “Bad Teacher,” etc., what other occupation or calling usually presumed to be good could use a “bad” version? Casting and plot suggestions welcome.

REVIEWS:
Lights Out: C 4/10
Ice Age: Collision Course: C- n/a
Absolutely Fabulous: The Movie: C n/a

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Episode 318: ‘Ghostbusters,’ ‘The Infiltrator,’ ‘Captain Fantastic,’ ‘Hunt for the Wilderpeople’

0:00 – Hello, it was Jeff’s 40th birthday on Thursday
2:35 – “Ghostbusters” review
20:50 – “The Infiltrator” review
27:55 – “Captain Fantastic” review
38:10 – “Hunt for the Wilderpeople” review
43:35 – QOTW (best fictional cities to live in, with much discussion of the benefits of Metropolis and Emerald City)
1:00:10 – Summer Box Office Massacre update, an update on an Indiana Jones story, recap, goodbye

QOTW: We’re voting on the Mt. Rushmore of sci-fi! Tell us your four (4) favorite sci-fi movies (in any order).

REVIEWS:
Ghostbusters: B- 7/10
The Infiltrator: B 8/10
Captain Fantastic: B 8/10
Hunt for the Wilderpeople: B+ 7/10

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Episode 317: ‘Mike and Dave Need Wedding Dates,’ ‘The Secret Life of Pets,’ ‘Swiss Army Man,’ Interquel

0:00 – Intro, iTunes review
4:45 – “Mike and Dave Need Wedding Dates” review
13:05 – “The Secret Life of Pets” review
22:00 – “Swiss Army Man” review
29:10 – QOTW (wedding stories)
40:00 – We’ve added a perk for Patreon patrons
41:20 – A round of Interquel, which we erroneously call Character Casserole the whole time because we’re idiots
47:50 – A brief, tactful Summer Box Office Challenge update
48:50 – Recap and goodbye

QOTW: What fictional town from a movie would you like to live in?

REVIEWS:
Mike and Dave Need Wedding Dates: B- 7/10
The Secret Life of Pets: C- 5/10
Swiss Army Man: B+ 8/10 (B.S.-approved!)

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Episode 316: ‘The BFG,’ ‘The Legend of Tarzan,’ ‘The Purge: Election Year,’ ‘Independence Day: Resurgence,’ ‘The Neon Demon’

0:00 – Intro; iTunes review; Dogcat smokes crack
3:05 – “The BFG” review
11:15 – “The Legend of Tarzan” review
20:00 – “The Purge: Election Year” review (Snider only)
27:25 – “Independence Day: Resurgence” review
38:00 – “The Neon Demon” review (Snider only)
42:30 – QOTW (favorite Spielberg moments)
51:50 – Next week’s QOTW, and some wedding talk
53:30 – Summer Box Office Challenge update
57:00 – Our new Patreon campaign
58:40 – Recap and goodbye

QOTW: What’s a story from a wedding you attended that would make a good movie?

REVIEWS:
The BFG: C+ 5/10
The Legend of Tarzan: C 7/10
The Purge: Election Year: C+ n/a
Independence Day: Resurgence: C 3/10
The Neon Demon: B n/a

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Episode 315: ‘The Shallows,’ ‘Free State of Jones,’ ‘De Palma’

0:00 – Hello, Jeff’s in a mood, iTunes review
2:20 – “Independence Day: Resurgence” wasn’t screened for critics in the U.S.
4:50 – “Free State of Jones” review
14:15 – “The Shallows” review (Snider only), ending with shark anecdotes
19:20 – “De Palma” review (Snider only)
22:20 – QOTW (movies from 1996 that should get sequels)
33:25 – Summer Box Office Challenge update
39:50 – What Bayer wants for his 40th birthday — and how you can help
45:25 – Recap and goodbye

QOTW: What is your favorite Spielberg moment?

REVIEWS:
Free State of Jones: C 5/10
The Shallows: B n/a
De Palma: B+ n/a

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Episode 314: ‘Finding Dory,’ ‘Central Intelligence,’ ‘Tickled,’ ‘Genius’

0:00 – Hello, an iTunes review, a bit of show history
4:20 – “Finding Dory” review
13:50 – “Central Intelligence” review
22:25 – “Tickled” review
31:30 – “Genius” review
39:35 – QOTW (best movie deaths)
49:20 – Summer Box Office Challenge update
50:20 – Recap and goodbye

QOTW: In honor of “Independence Day: Resurgence,” what other movie from 1996 should get a sequel? (Here’s a handy list of 1996 films.)

REVIEWS:
Finding Dory: B 8/10
Central Intelligence: B 7/10
Tickled: A- 8/10 (B.S.-approved!)
Genius: C+ 6/10

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Episode 313: ‘The Conjuring 2,’ ‘Now You See Me 2,’ ‘Warcraft’

0:00 – Hello, iTunes review, a poor memory of history
3:30 – “The Conjuring 2” review
17:15 – “Now You See Me 2” review
27:20 – “Warcraft” review
42:05 – QOTW (your top movie character crushes)
55:20 – Jeff hijacks the show to mention that he’s turning 40 next month
56:00 – Summer Box Office Challenge update
1:00:00 – Recap, farewell
1:01:20 – BONUS: “The Lady Is a Trump,” by Eric

QOTW: What is the best movie death?

REVIEWS:
The Conjuring 2: B 6/10
Now You See Me 2: C- 4/10
Warcraft: D 5/10

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Episode 312: ‘Popstar: Never Stop Never Stopping,’ ‘Approaching the Unknown’

0:00 – Introduction, all the movies screened at once so we could only see one of them
4:15 – “Popstar: Never Stop Never Stopping” review
14:50 – “Approaching the Unknown” review
19:00 – QOTW (Mt. Rushmore of sports movies)
31:25 – You Guys Ask Us Stuff (behind-the-scenes show magic)
35:30 – Summer Box Office Challenge update
39:20 – Recap and goodbye

QOTW: Who is your #1 movie character crush?

REVIEWS:
Popstar: B- 6/10
Approaching the Unknown B- 5/10

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Episode 311: ‘X-Men: Apocalypse,’ ‘Alice Through the Looking Glass,’ ‘Pele,’ Character Casserole

0:00 – Introduction, bad radio voices
2:05 – We saw “X-Men: Apocalypse” really early, which didn’t help us at all
3:25 – “X-Men: Apocalypse” review, ending with a disagreement over whether or not we disagree on the movie
12:35 – “Alice Through the Looking Glass” review
20:15 – “Pelé” review (Snider only)
23:20 – QOTW (movie products you’d like to own)
34:40 – Summer Box Office Challenge update
37:15 – A round of Character Casserole (Joker, Anakin Skywalker, Mad Hatter)
46:30 – Recap, more debate about “pretty good” vs. “not very good,” the end

QOTW: We’re compiling the Mt. Rushmore of sports movies. Tell us your four (4) favorite sports movies (order doesn’t matter).

REVIEWS:
X-Men: Apocalypse: C+ 6/10
Alice Through the Looking Glass: D 3/10
Pele: C n/a

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Episode 310: ‘The Nice Guys,’ ‘Neighbors 2,’ ‘The Angry Birds Movie,’ ‘A Bigger Splash’

0:00 – Hello; Snider’s apathy toward sparkling water, which Bayer loves
3:25 – iTunes review
4:50 – “The Nice Guys” review
15:40 – “Neighbors 2: Sorority Rising” review
23:40 – “The Angry Birds Movie” review (Snider only)
31:30 – “A Bigger Splash” review (Snider only)
34:10 – QOTW (pitches for movies based on apps)
42:30 – Hey, What’d You Watch? (“Sweet Smell of Success,” “Mary Poppins,” “The Wicker Man”)
51:00 – Recap, a few more words about the movies, the end

QOTW: What fictitious product from a movie would you like to own?

REVIEWS:
The Nice Guys: B+ 8/10 (B.S.-approved!)
Neighbors 2: Sorority Rising: B+ 8/10 (B.S.-approved!)
The Angry Birds Movie: D- n/a
A Bigger Splash: B n/a

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